Hey, it's been awhile...

Rye worked. Violet watched the new Beyoncé videos. Rye got home. Violet was wearing his shirt. She put on red lipstick. Then put that lipstick to the test. On Rye. Thanks Beyoncé. Music: <div xmlns:cc="http://creativecommons.org/ns#" xmlns:dct="http://purl.org/dc/terms/" about="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Kellee_Maize/Aligned_Archetype/13__Kellee_Maize__Freakuency__Aligned_Archetype__FrostWirecom"><span property="dct:title">Freakuency</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" property="cc:attributionName" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Kellee_Maize/">Kellee Maize</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/">CC BY 3.0</a></div>

It was our first day off together in a few weeks, which was cause for celebration. So we broke out the rare bourbon, toasted, and got down to business. Cheers! You may have noticed the black marks all over us. We're tired of editing around tattoos, so we did what any reasonable person would and covered them in electrical tape. The freedom we felt in shooting this one was pretty exhilarating, and we think it really shows. Music: <div><span>Enjoyable to Know</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/C_Scott/">C. Scott</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/">CC BY 3.0</a></div>

When it's spring, and raining, and you've got the day off, there are few better ways to spend it than strapping it on and giving it to the man you love. The incredible song is by Cullah and can be found here: <div><span>Cold Kind of Woman Blues</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/MC_Cullah/">Cullah</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/">CC BY-SA 4.0</a></div>

Crocuses are blooming outside our doors. Inside our doors, spring brings with it the blossoming of unquenchable sexual desire. Lucky you, we shared.

We recently picked up a sex swing. It required a bit of practice. We like practice. We think you'll like our practice too.

Not many people think of handjobs in a positive way after college. We move on to blowjobs, to intercourse, to anal, to so many other things. And then we put the handjob on the shelf, reserving it for solo time. Not so fast, we say! After getting some inspiration from another video, we're reclaiming sexy handjobs. The key? LOTS of baby oil and PLENTY of creative hand-y work.rn

So the new D'Angelo came out, his first record in 15 years. Voodoo, his last record, has been Violet's masturbation soundtrack for the last...15 years. We listened to the new record. Violet got inspired.

It's Saturday morning. That means two things: 1. Time to make the coffee. 2. Find a nice spot in the living room to masturbate. After all, what are weekends for?

Say you find yourself with a mostly plan-free Saturday. You're now faced with a number of options about how to spend the morning, especially in NYC. In our case, the morning goes as follows: Lounge around in bed, mostly naked, check social media, snuggle. Eventually, one of you feels motivated enough to get some iced coffee and once coffee is in the picture, anything is possible... By anything, we mean sex stuff. A lot of it, and for a while. Once satisfied, it's time to eat something because we suddenly realize we're STARVING. Music: 1974 Xenia Tornado by Fields of Ohio <div><span>1974 Xenia Tornado</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://fieldsofohio.bandcamp.com/">Fields of Ohio</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/">CC BY-SA 3.0</a></div>

If anal is taboo, then pegging is idiotically so. For us, it's always just been a part of a healthy, happy and hot sex life. Allow us to demonstrate, we think we'll win you over.rn