We recently picked up a sex swing.

Crocuses are blooming outside our doors. Inside our doors, spring brings with it the blossoming of unquenchable sexual desire. Lucky you, we shared.

Hey, it's been a while. In the time we've been gone, we've moved, started a business, and basically changed everything. But we're back, and happy to be. One of the better life improvements is our fireplace, which is the tits. We hang in front of it a lot. And the hanging leads to... other stuff.

It's Saturday morning. That means two things: 1. Time to make the coffee. 2. Find a nice spot in the living room to masturbate. After all, what are weekends for?

Violet felt the urge to do some yoga. I felt the urge to film it. Which led to an even bigger urge to join in.

Sometimes you just want to settle in for a little time with the person who knows all your secret buttons -- yourself. That's exactly what Rye does here, and for him, those buttons are EVERYWHERE. This video features an expertly handled cock, a vintage chair, anal stimulation and a bouquet of flowers. Who ever said romance was dead?

After venturing to the Farmers' Market, we decided the best way to spend this unexpectedly chilly day was to be inside. Without clothes. So we picked up a camera and played around until Rye said, "I'm going to eat your pussy until you come, and you film it." And he did. And I did. And then some.

It was our first day off together in a few weeks, which was cause for celebration. So we broke out the rare bourbon, toasted, and got down to business. Cheers! You may have noticed the black marks all over us. We're tired of editing around tattoos, so we did what any reasonable person would and covered them in electrical tape. The freedom we felt in shooting this one was pretty exhilarating, and we think it really shows. Music: <div><span>Enjoyable to Know</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/C_Scott/">C. Scott</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/">CC BY 3.0</a></div>

So the new D'Angelo came out, his first record in 15 years. Voodoo, his last record, has been Violet's masturbation soundtrack for the last...15 years. We listened to the new record. Violet got inspired.

Not many people think of handjobs in a positive way after college. We move on to blowjobs, to intercourse, to anal, to so many other things. And then we put the handjob on the shelf, reserving it for solo time. Not so fast, we say! After getting some inspiration from another video, we're reclaiming sexy handjobs. The key? LOTS of baby oil and PLENTY of creative hand-y work.rn

When it's spring, and raining, and you've got the day off, there are few better ways to spend it than strapping it on and giving it to the man you love. The incredible song is by Cullah and can be found here: <div><span>Cold Kind of Woman Blues</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/MC_Cullah/">Cullah</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/">CC BY-SA 4.0</a></div>