We recently picked up a sex swing.

Not many people think of handjobs in a positive way after college. We move on to blowjobs, to intercourse, to anal, to so many other things. And then we put the handjob on the shelf, reserving it for solo time. Not so fast, we say! After getting some inspiration from another video, we're reclaiming sexy handjobs. The key? LOTS of baby oil and PLENTY of creative hand-y work.rn

Violet felt the urge to do some yoga. I felt the urge to film it. Which led to an even bigger urge to join in.

Crocuses are blooming outside our doors. Inside our doors, spring brings with it the blossoming of unquenchable sexual desire. Lucky you, we shared.

Hey, it's been a while. In the time we've been gone, we've moved, started a business, and basically changed everything. But we're back, and happy to be. One of the better life improvements is our fireplace, which is the tits. We hang in front of it a lot. And the hanging leads to... other stuff.

It was our first day off together in a few weeks, which was cause for celebration. So we broke out the rare bourbon, toasted, and got down to business. Cheers! You may have noticed the black marks all over us. We're tired of editing around tattoos, so we did what any reasonable person would and covered them in electrical tape. The freedom we felt in shooting this one was pretty exhilarating, and we think it really shows. Music: <div><span>Enjoyable to Know</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/C_Scott/">C. Scott</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/">CC BY 3.0</a></div>

Sometimes you just want to settle in for a little time with the person who knows all your secret buttons -- yourself. That's exactly what Rye does here, and for him, those buttons are EVERYWHERE. This video features an expertly handled cock, a vintage chair, anal stimulation and a bouquet of flowers. Who ever said romance was dead?

Rye worked. Violet watched the new Beyoncé videos. Rye got home. Violet was wearing his shirt. She put on red lipstick. Then put that lipstick to the test. On Rye. Thanks Beyoncé. Music: <div xmlns:cc="http://creativecommons.org/ns#" xmlns:dct="http://purl.org/dc/terms/" about="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Kellee_Maize/Aligned_Archetype/13__Kellee_Maize__Freakuency__Aligned_Archetype__FrostWirecom"><span property="dct:title">Freakuency</span> (<a rel="cc:attributionURL" property="cc:attributionName" href="http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Kellee_Maize/">Kellee Maize</a>) / <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/">CC BY 3.0</a></div>

Summer is a time for bikini maintenance, flowers in bloom and vacation quickies. Editing this video helped bring us back to a warmer place and time, one that we can't wait to get back to. We hope it gives you some of those same sensations. And maybe a few others...

So the new D'Angelo came out, his first record in 15 years. Voodoo, his last record, has been Violet's masturbation soundtrack for the last...15 years. We listened to the new record. Violet got inspired.

It's Saturday morning. That means two things: 1. Time to make the coffee. 2. Find a nice spot in the living room to masturbate. After all, what are weekends for?